Saturday, January 2, 2010
Does this shirt make my butt look big?
Howdy campers, and welcome to a brand new year! 2010. Holy crap really? It seems like yesterday that we were all stocking up on water and canned goods because OH MY GOD the world was going to end-Y2K!!! RUN AAAAAHHHHH! I admit, I did buy extra bottles of water - you know, just in case. I justified it by the fact that my husband liked bottled water and he would consume it anyway...
Oh well, the world didnt end. We are all still here riding the blue green marble!
So today I decided I needed to start the year with a pedi. I used to go every two weeks but now I go once a month-we are all economizing you know :) So I had a relaxing pedi including cool sea green OPI polish and decided that since I had braved the mall, I was going to stop at Lane Bryant. The seasons are changing (at least in retailers minds) and so I thought there might be something interesting. Well, I did. I find it interesting that Lane Bryant and other stores for us big sexy bitches pays no attention to their real life clientelle.
Take for example the red number at the top. This top says less of "cute and sexy" and more of "cheap fingerhut bedspread" Come on, imagine someone say a size 26/28 in this top. Take a moment to get a good visual. Not pretty right? The ruffles and shiny material do nothing but make her look bigger. Sad thing is that this woman is probably a 10/12.
I like simpler clothing. Nice detailing sure but lets be real. Im a big girl. Sure I have a fantastic bustline and cleavage to die from, but framing my bodacious tatas in shiny red ruffles does nothing but make me look like I a) have absolutely no taste b) like looking 50 and c) dress in a room with no mirror.
This wasnt the worst top-by a long shot. The new sweaters are in candy colors straight out of 1984. They weren't cute then-they aren't cute now. Tank tops with ruffled layers...yeah no. It MIGHT be ok if they were meant to be worn with a light cardigan buuuut they aren't. Again visions of the 26/28 in this tank top... not pretty. I admit I am a 26/28. Granted Ive lost a little weight and am almost to 22/24 but still, I wouldnt be caught dead in this stuff. They cant honestly tell me that by adding sequins to the nipples of a empire waisted top is going to distract from my size. Rather than trying to distract with horrible ruffles, giant plastic jewels and sequins, lets try simple, flattering pretty clothing. Clothing that doesnt look like it belongs on my grandma-clothing that fits well-clothing that doesnt have patterns that look like a flamingo threw up. In other words, clothing that looks nice. Big girls are beautiful, why cant we have pretty clothes too?
We just need the retailers to pay attention.
Oh and btw retailers-big girls have big boobs. 28" tops on a woman with large breasts looks like a crop top. Really?? Seriously?? I dont think so! It seems they realize tops should be longer between 4 and 5x. Unfortunately for me-wearing a 3-4x, that doesnt really help.
Ah hell, maybe this is my calling. Going back to school-again for fashion design. Have you watched Project Runway? Not the current mess but the first 4 seasons? They design wonderful clothing-for size 0. An 8 year old girl is a size 0. Americans are getting bigger. I read somewhere that the average size of the American woman is a 12. A 12-not a 0. Sad that they ignore the pardon the pun-growing market for beautiful clothes in larger sizes.
Oh hell.
Well my friends, thats my rant. Take it, leave it, disregard it or learn from it-your choice.
'night.
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